Accepting

    The other day, I came across a post about moving on and it really rewires my view on it a bit. The OP said, moving on doesn't mean forgetting the whole thing entirely. Moving on means accepting. Accepting that this had to happen. That this is crucial for your timeline, in order for you to be on the right track— the path that you are meant to be.

    I'm not gonna lie, the word "moving on" really do scares me most of the times. I always view moving on as an act of leaving everything behind and forgetting the moments that I used to held so close to my heart. Maybe not all of the memories but more on letting it go. The rope that once were held tight were let go entirely.

    Then, seeing that one sentence, I started to rethink back abt the times I thought I had moved on and I came to a conclusion that, some of the events that happened, I claimed that I have moved on from it, but in reality my heart is still not accepting it. While the other half, I claimed that I'm still stuck, at the restaurant (as per what Taylor Swift said). In reality, I didn't even notice that I have actually left the seat long time ago. I have simply accepted it.

    I accept that it happened. I accept that they left. I accept that they no longer love me the way I do. I accept that I am no longer useful or beneficial to have in their life. I have accepted it but why do I sometimes feel like something is still missing?

    One day, I went online and stumbled on a book recs: The Let Them Theory by Mel Robbins. It is a nice book, very easy to read to be honest as a person who rarely have time to read anything at all. In that book, I finally know what I have been missing. Another hidden phrase that is not written. Let me.

    All these while I practiced the "let them". Let them leave. Let them walk away. Let them choose someone else to be their friend. Let them take their time to finally talk again. But I didn't realized that the LET ME is not in action yet.

    After reading few chapters, I started to remind myself the "let them, let me". Let them take their time browsing thru the bookstore and let me tell her I'll be waiting around the corner elsewhere instead of pushing her to make a decision. Let them have their own reunion, let me reach out and ask them how they've been. Let them scold me for mistakes, let me improve and be more particular on details.

    It struck me that the Let Them theory actually applicable to moving on too. It all comes back to the act of Acceptance. I need to accept that they are not willing to have me around them anymore. So, let me find and appreciate others who appreciate my presence. I have to accept that they are no longer falling for me. So, let me bid the last farewell and be with people who always find me amusing.

    It truly amaze me how a sentence could actually change the way you see things and how a simple and short mantra helps you be in control of your own feeling.

    I don't think anyone would see this post but if you do, thank you for coming by my jendela. I hope this small post can be a little nudge of reminder that the only thing you can control is you.

Love, Juita.